Hillary Clinton - the most qualified person in history to run for race director?

Following up on the Donald, the ultra ultrarunner, if Hillary Clinton was involved in ultrarunning, I'd imagine she'd be a race director. What kind of race director? Well, she probably first got the job by working the trails as a volunteer course monitor, telling people which way to go.

Here she is saying, "You just stepped in dog poop!"











"Kilian and Jason, you are both winners of the 2016 Hardrock 100!!!!"

"It's all downhill from here to the next aid station!"

She probably invented the popular refrain at aid stations, "good job, looking good".

"Hey, didn't I see you at Way Too Cool in '09?"

"Go ahead, pull my finger!"

"I saw that! No cutting corners on the switchbacks!"

"What do y'all think of my orange running pantsuit?"

With her connections, she may be able to convince an A-list of runners to show up at her Whitewater 100 Endurance Challenge. The challenge is to stay ahead of the sweepers - a running club of federal prosecutors.

Bush #41 and Bush #43 might get there. Hillary will probably change course mid-way through and "accidentally" delete the email notifying them. G.W. Bush will claim victory before getting lost on the course and going the wrong way.

An older gentlemen thought he was rightfully in the lead, but admitted after the race was over that he was nearly 5 million steps behind.

B.S. napping at an aid station

The main reason why Hillary is race director is because of this guy, Barack Obama. Just as Hillary was peaking as a runner and close to winning the U.S. championships, the rookie runner, who'd only run a few community fat-ass races in Chicago, showed up channeling his inner Anton Krupicka and won the race in the last hour.

And here's a picture of Ivanka running because we need to balance this article for the straight male audience, and also, who wants to see Donald Trump shirtless? Probably no one, including Melania. 

Of course, Hillary's biggest challenge as race director would be keeping an eye on this guy. Say, "Hi", Bill.

"Bill Clinton picked up women while jogging as staffers snorted cocaine at work", Daily Mail UK.