The Quest for More Broken Toenail at the 2019 Broken Arrow Skyrace

What can I say about my experience at the 2019 Broken Arrow Skyrace? It's not fun to write about a race unless it's a disaster. "For you it does," says my wife. So true. In that vein, please read the rest of this race report in Ben Stein's voice. "Bueller? Bueller?"

This was not my first time to this rodeo. I ran the 52k back in snow filled 2017. That was a near disaster where Ramiro and I spent a lot of time questioning our life choices and barely made the cutoff. After an experience like that, why would anyone come back? Anyone? Anyone? An idiot would. (are you still reading this in Ben Stein’s voice?) And would an idiot be satisfied with just repeating the same 52k route? Anyone? Anyone? Anyone seen this before? Bueller? The idiot would sign up for both the 52k and the 26k races, one for Saturday and one for Sunday.

I managed to drag my wife along for the trip, too. She even signed up for the 11k! I guess she figured that moving for a few hours in the mountains was better than spending 2 days shopping. That’s my Montana girl. 

Conga line on a single track. Get the full UTMB experience! 

Why ski down when you can climb up? 

Saturday. At a reasonable, not so ungodly hour of 7AM, we started down the fire road and quickly sorted ourselves on the single track. The first 4 miles are what one might call a normal trail run, although the thin air at 7,000 ft had me wheezing like a blind puppy. The first real climb up a ski slope was surprisingly dry, but the rest of the course had about as much snow as it did in 2017. This climb and its sibling are steep, ~30-35%. but only gains 600ft and are done in ~20 minutes. From there, it’s a modestly steep mile down a partially snow covered fire road to the Easy Street aid station. This is also the turn-off to complete the 11k loop. Unfortunately, the 11k didn’t start until 9AM, so there was no way for me to blend in with a crowd of 11k runners. Instead, I had to stay on the official course and tackle the next climb.

KT-22. Easy for a turtle 

And what a climb. An extra pair of added switchbacks simplified the climb but we thankfully still had an epic snow climb up fixed rope. The cold morning hardened the snow and we made quick work of the climb up KT-22, overall 1 mile and 1,000 ft from the aid station. From that summit, we briefly descend before climbing up the south side of Squaw Peak, so it’s relatively dry. A 1.2 mile climb up another 1,000 ft, albeit with some rock scrambling and ladder climbing, which? Anyone? Seemed a bit precarious in high wind. 

By now at the top of the Laffer Curve of the course, it’s mostly downhill. Is anyone else getting tired of these Ben Stein econ jokes? Anyone? Anyone? This morning run on the west slope was freezing. Most of us were wearing tank tops and bikini bottoms (under my shorts) passing skiers warmly dressed in expedition gear. We then dropped for a loop into Shirley Canyon. Surely, we couldn’t have just made this an even 50k and left this section out? Nope, and don’t call me a Shirley. 

From the final aid station, it’s 3.5 miles downhill to the finish, with the last ¾ mile shared with the finishers of the 11k. Speaking of which, my wife and I were wondering who would finish first. If I could finish my first loop in 5 hours, she should have to finish her 11k in less than 3 to see me. Instead, I passed her with a half mile to go and waited to high-5 her into her finish. 

Shirley, we must be done with all this climbing by now. 

Spot the fruit powered Mike Wardian

4:12 for my first loop. Not bad considering my first loop was 5:20 two years ago. Unfortunately, I finished the first loop with cramps. I said earlier that the day was not a disaster and though it could have been, I managed. I didn’t hydrate, salt and eat too well on the first lap. Felt too good until I didn’t. Stupid. I haven’t done a long run in a while. I managed to keep the quad and shin cramps under control for the second lap. It was decidedly slower, not just because I was tired and cramped, but because the snow was slushier and challenging to run on. In slush, the climb up KT-22 was a hold-onto-the-rope-for-dear-life affair, too. In the end, though I feared I might take over 6 hours, I managed in 5 and a half, finishing in a cool 9:45. 

Life is good for the Mirnavator - before her 26k of course.

After a shower and dinner with the Mirnavator (two separate activities - I showered alone), I briefly considering not running the 26k the next day. Question my life choices before the race, not during. Such strategy! In any case, if I couldn’t do a two day skyrace, then I can’t handle my summer race. So there it is. 

Sunday. Back at it. I had a “farmer’s tan” from my sleeveless shirt. I looked like an action figure with the wrong arms attached. Tanning strategy, yes, I have one, dictated that I wear sleeves! My strategy was just to survive. I didn’t have to go fast to call it a success. My legs were sore but not cramped. I jogged and walked fairly slowly the first 5 miles, letting several runners pass me on the single track. My third loop of the weekend was completed without any significant problems. I took advantage of the slower pace to take more pictures and still managed to finish in under 5 hours and probably in better shape than I was at the end of my first loop the day before. Success! Jim Buckley stuck around to see me in after his epic 11+ hour outing the day before, as did Bree and Joe after her AG win on the 26k. Ashley and Alex also had good days on the 26k course though I didn't see either. And least you think I'm the only crazy one, Michael Li, did both of my races and the VK race on Friday. All beasts, and all a little crazy.

Broken Duke

And with that, with one toenail less than when I started, I’m “ready” for summer. I leave you with the full Ben Stein movie quote, which, if I had this before the run, I'm sure I would have solved our fiscal crsis or fallen asleep by KT-22.

In 1930, the Republican-controlled House of Representatives, in an effort to alleviate the effects of the... Anyone? Anyone?... the Great Depression, passed the... Anyone? Anyone? The tariff bill? The Hawley-Smoot Tariff Act? Which, anyone? Raised or lowered?... Raised tariffs, in an effort to collect more revenue for the federal government. Did it work? Anyone? Anyone know the effects? It did not work, and the United States sank deeper into the Great Depression.